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{ Choosing Your Wedding Party }

We all know the crossroads that you come to when you realize you can't include ALL of your favorite friends in your wedding. So here's some helpful hints and general rules to keep in mind when coordinating your wedding party:

1. The size of your wedding matters!

If you're having a smaller wedding with 50-60 guests, try to have no more than 4 bridesmaids/groomsmen. If you're having a larger wedding with around 150 guests, you could chose up to 12 if you really wanted to! The average wedding party size is 8, 4 bridesmaids and 4 groomsmen. If you have a lot of friends you want to include in the wedding party but only have a few spots to fill, give them other jobs like an usher, candle-lighter, ceremony reader, etc. But nobody is going to kill you if you have more or less than the average number of bridesmaids/groomsmen! Just use your best judgement!

2. Think twice before you ask!

Asking someone to be in your wedding is kind of a big deal. So that's something you can't go back on. Don't immediately ask all of your friends to be in your wedding the week you get engaged. Take some time to get your thoughts together so you can really think about your options. Ask yourself if you see you and a friend being as close as you are now in 3-5 years. That can be a strong determining factor as to whether or not you include them in the wedding party.

3. Include your brothers and sisters!

Unlike your friends, its inevitable that your siblings will be around by your 10-year anniversary. Even if you're not all that close to them right now, you will more than likely grow closer to your siblings as time goes on and you get older too! Plus, you would want to include someone you have literally grown up with to be a part of a monumental day in your life.

4. Don't ask someone just because they asked you.

The point of bridesmaids/groomsmen isn't a way to return a favor, its your choosing of who you have the closest ties to and who you see being your friend 5 years even after becoming married. Don't ask your college roommate that you haven't spoken to in years

just because they asked you. In some cases, you're getting married a few years out of college. It will be easier to figure out which friends have stuck around even when the real world hits, and if someone wants to talk to you about why you didn't pick them for your wedding, just be honest! Tell them it was a tough decision but you felt that you included the people who were closest to you at this point in your life.


5. Kids aren't required!

Don't think that you have to ask one of your distant, baby cousins to be a flower girl just to be filling that role. If you aren't particularly close to any kids, don't worry-a ring bearer and flower girl aren't mandatory. If you're planning to have an 'adults only' wedding, you can still have the kids play their parts in the ceremony and not allow them at the reception. Because everyone still loves that "aw" moment when the cute flower girl and ring bearer stumble down the aisle!

- Soirees Southern Events -

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